When Nutritionist and Diet Coach Mattie Mola, specialist in the obese child is at a social gathering and talking with people who don’t know her work, she engages in social eavesdropping as she makes her way around the room.

One of the recurring conversational themes is the state of kids’ nutrition. The adults present tend to feel sorry for the unfortunate fat kids, because, they say, “children can be cruel.” News flash: the cruelty of other children isn’t the worst thing.

During the course of interviewing parents who had been overweight as children and current overweight middle schoolers, Mola uncovered perturbing information. While each of them could recall the painful ridicule and bullying from classmates and even family members, it was not the worst thing.  The worst thing is the staggeringly negative feelings they have about themselves. The abuse and ridicule serve to compound these negative feelings. These negative feelings often carry over into adulthood and inhibit emotional and social growth. Research indicates that “overweight children are much more likely than average weight children to describe themselves as lonely or sad, fearful or different.” Contrary to a popular misconception, overweight children are not happily heavy. 

Feel like you don’t know where to turn? What positive action is needed now? Here’s a heap of help for the parents of an obese child.